The chain of wedlock is so heavy that it takes two to carry it - and sometimes three.

婚姻的枷锁是如此沉重，需要两个人来扛，有时甚至需要三个人。

The comfortable estate of widowhood is the only hope that keeps up a wife's spirits.

守寡生活的舒适状态是保持妻子精神的唯一希望。

The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but must live with a character.

婚姻的困难之处在于，我们爱上了一个人的性格，但生活中必须有一个性格。

The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.

婚姻的核心是回忆;如果你们两个碰巧拥有相同的另一半，并且能够欣赏你们的重播，那么你们的婚姻就是上帝赐予的礼物。

The human brain starts working the moment you are born and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.

从你出生的那一刻起，人类的大脑就开始工作，直到你站起来在公众面前讲话，大脑才停止工作。

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.

狮子和小牛会躺在一起，但小牛睡不了多少觉。

The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.

大多数丈夫让我想起一只猩猩在拉小提琴。

The one thing that I'm in charge of in this wedding is the food.

在这场婚礼上，我唯一负责的就是食物。

The secret of a successful marriage is not to be at home too much.

成功婚姻的秘诀是不要太多呆在家里。

The trouble with wedlock is that there's not enough wed and too much lock.

婚姻的问题是没有足够的婚姻和太多的锁。

There is a time for all things - except marriage, my dear.

所有的事情都有一个时间——除了婚姻，亲爱的。

There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage.

没有什么话题比婚姻更危险的胡言乱语了。

There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about.

世界上没有什么比已婚妇女的奉献精神更可贵的了。这是一件已婚男人一无所知的事情。

There's nothing like a good cheating song to make me want to run home to be with my wife.

没有什么比一首好听的欺骗歌曲更能让我想跑回家和妻子在一起。

They dream in courtship, but in wedlock wake.

他们在求爱时做梦，但在婚姻中醒来。